October 14th, 2005 (11:30 pm)
current mood: sick
current song: Engel ~ Rammstein
This is a public post, much more civil than the last.
I must make a few things clear:
I do NOT feel I was unjustified for my actions earlier, however after talking to
glitterygashes, I do know I was wrong. Marissa is actually a very nice, very smart, and very interesting girl, and I was mistaken about her intent. I do feel badly about upsetting her, as the problem came down to two very different ideas of ettiquette on a very dangerous subject. For the record: I do not react well when I find out that something I said--particularly something that is being evaluated and even mocked at times--is put somewhere else without my knowledge.
otakuraven can vouch for me, be it something I've said or something somebody else said that I happen to know, it's a very efficient way to take my temper from mild to explosive. If you want to post a view of mine somewhere, please just ask me, because I have no qualms with people seeing my viewpoints and arguing them, but I do want to know it's happening, instead of feeling like people are talking about me behind my back and dealing with the fear of the spreading hatred for me starting because of something I said but couldn't defend. Slightly illogical, yes, but it does happen.
The people who actually commented on the argument in such a manner, however, I do not feel any different towards. These people were more than happy to go on as they did, without bothering to ask for any way to address me personally and give me a chance to defend myself. Likewise, there were people who I felt were very considerate and although I don't agree with them on their points about what I said, I do, however, have respect for them, as they did for me.
So this is my public setting, non-screened comment feminism post. Eventually I'll actually get the whole of the debate between Marissa and me from the comments on a friend's journal and post them, but right now I'm far too tired and have a horrid sinus infection, thus doing so seems to require more energy than I am capable of. In the meantime, go ahead and post comments about the post in
feminist.
Explanation on one thing that seemed to be far too controversial than is comfortable to me:
The parking for pregnant women--as a friend of mine pointed out, exercise is good for pregnant women. And also, if you are having any complications with your pregnancy that does not allow you to walk the length of a parking lot, then you a) should not be out at the Publix, as you will be required to walk once inside anyway, and b) should probably not be driving, ergo no need for the parking space.
Furthermore, as I explained to Marissa, yes, I do feel as though the so-called "oppression" is the fault of modern-day women, and no, I was not brainwashed by the patriarchal society. I am not dismissing the fact that life for women is unfair; however there is nothing stopping women from changing that by making sacrifices and proving themselves to men. As I also explained, this does require succumbing to the unfair system and going extra miles and doing more work for the same recognition as a man who has done less, however I think it would be a much more permanent issue than the current activism route, which often centers around demanding fairness without making those sacrifices and without doing that extra work.
Is it unfair that a woman has to do more than her male counterpart for the same prize? No. Is it real, nevertheless? Yes. Can it be changed if women are willing to do more than their fair share at first? Absolutely. I think feminism should crack down on women who wish to just change things by arguing with those in charge about social norms these days.